Letter to My Son on Biblical Gender Equality

Dear Son,

I am so thankful and privileged that God entrusted you to me!  You are such an amazing and wonderful boy!  You are sweet and innocent, excited for life, joyful, and strong!  You are becoming such a stunning young man!  You have so much to contribute to life.

I am so glad that you have such an amazing father to look up to.  He may be hard on you sometimes, but he loves you so much and wants you to reach your full potential. (I knew that would catch your attention since it’s from ninjago!)  He wants you to know who you are in Christ from the get go, so you will be spared the troubles that he went through.

I want you to know that you are free!  You may not need me to tell you that, but I want you to truly know that!  You don’t have to live up to the definition of masculinity put out by the world or the church.  Christ put in you everything He wants you to exemplify!  If you swing more towards mercy than judgement, that’s okay.  If you swing more towards compassion than warfare, that’s okay.  Don’t let the term masculinity define you.  You define the term masculinity.  You don’t have to be strong all the time.  You don’t have to hold back your tears.  You don’t have to give up the part of you that loves fun and silliness.

I want you to know that society and the church has put you in a very tough position.  You are viewed as a leader above women, just because of your gender.  Dear son, this is a very scary place.  To embrace that would protect your “position” in life.  But this protection will come at a very steep price.  You will lose part of you if you decide to continue in the subjugation of women.  You will always have to be strong.  You won’t be able to cry.  You will always have to lead, even in situations that you are not prepared to.  All responsibility will fall on you, and you will even be taught that you are accountable to God for other’s actions and heart.

I hope I have surrounded you with people that have shown you a different way.  I hope you see that when you elevate women to a level of equality with you, the world is a better place!  You are free.  Women are free.  You are all free to be who God has designed you to be.  You don’t need people “submitting” to you based on rules.  You need people to “submit” to you because they love you, because you recognize they are free, and you respect and honor them.

I pray that one day you marry a free woman!  You will have such a happy marriage if you recognize your wife is free, and she knows she is too.  You will have a marriage based on mutual love, respect and submission.  You won’t have to carry the responsibility and pressure of being the gender appointed leader of your family.  You will be free to be you!  Your marriage will be so successful because you will each be able to operate in the arenas that you excel in!  Her freedom is the key to your freedom!

You are so respectful and polite, especially towards women.  I love this about you.  This is something that has always been in your heart, and you don’t even know how much that touches those around you.  Don’t ever give that up!